Happy-Couple Syndrome. We all know what it is. We've all suffered from it at one time or another, either firsthand or because it has plagued someone we love. Happy-Couple Syndrome is a devastating and debilitating disease, one which knows no bounds -- and whose effects are crippling to those around its sufferers.
The symptoms of the Syndrome are clear and easily identifiable. The Syndrome's onset usually occurs within the first year of the relationship -- typically around the six-month mark -- and can last?forever, depending on the life and stability of the relationship.
At the Syndrome's onset, one or both members of the couple-in-question will be habitually marked by the readily recognizable "goofy smile/glow," a look of sheer happiness that is either enviable or irritating, depending on your perspective. The goofy smile/glow is symptomatic of a larger problem, and is most often directed at the person's partner, but sometimes show up randomly and when the person least expects it.
At this time, the person/sufferer will feel an uncontrollable urge to redirect his/her overwhelming joy and happiness. The most common outlet for this redirection takes the form of "the single friend." The Syndrome sufferer sees this friend(s) in an entirely new light now. Because of the incapacitating effects of the "goofy smile/glow," the person is now under the impression that Single Friend are is the one truly suffering, and thus he/she sets out to help Single Friend in all earnestness.
Therein lies the most far-reaching implication of the Happy-Couple Syndrome. It effects everyone around the people who suffer from it. Because it is at this point that the sufferer sets out -- again, in his/her incapacitation -- to subject "the single friend" to the state in which the sufferer finds him/herself. This is most often accomplished through the use of the sufferer's mate and questions such as "Don't you think that Single Friend would be happier if they were dating someone? Do you know anyone who would be good for Single Friend?" The mate, himself likely afflicted by Happy-Couple Syndrome as well, would be more than happy to oblige. The next thing you know, unsuspecting Single Friend is on his/her way to Set-Up Hell (or worse yet, lots of sympathetic looks and pitying talk about how "the single friend" should be on his/her way to Set-Up Hell).
The sufferer means well, of course. That's why Happy-Couple syndrome is so damn debilitating. Because after a while, the sufferer won't even realize the implications of his/her actions -- he/she will believe that he/she is actually acting on behalf of Single Friend's "best interests." Soon, Set-Up Hell will include blind dates with indiscriminate people chosen solely on the basis of their single-ness.
Unfortunately, there is no cure for Happy-Couple Syndrome, its greatest irony being that the Single Friend's inevitable fate is to one day fall prey to the Syndrome as well -- thus continuing the cycle forever.
