Vegetarianism is booming, and many famous people, like Stephen
Spielberg, are vegetarians. So, when adult children tell their parents they've
become vegetarians, the parents are less likely to accuse them of being
"weirdos" and "kooks," as parents might have done 20 years ago.
Still, new vegetarians, except for those whose parents are also
veggies, should expect some problems, says Arthur Goldberg, who heads Veggie
Singles in New York. Sometimes, parents don't recognize how strict
vegetarianism can be--"My parents gave me vegetables, but they were cooked in
the meat soup stock," he recalls. Other times, they will experience their
offspring's new-found vegetarianism, at least on some level, as a rejection of
their cooking.
One person whose experiences fall into this category is David
Franklin of Berkeley, Calif., 35, a social work student. He became a vegetarian
in his 20s, but says "it was a culture clash--my parents are from a traditional
Jewish background, and used to express love by throwing brisket at me. It took
some reorienting for them to serve something different for me, to start buying
stuff for me at the health food store."
Donna K-Brooks, 43, of Brattleboro, Vermont, remembers how she
became a vegetarian in her late 20s after seeing a film about conditions in
slaughterhouses. "The first time I saw my mother as a vegetarian, she just
ignored me and put a filet mignon on my plate, and I ate it1x The lure was just
too strong1x Eventually, she stopped cooking, so that wasn't a
problem."
As for her father, "He still doesn't get it. Whenever I see
him, he recommends a place because it has a great salad bar. I have to explain
to him that I need something more than salad."
Time, though, sometimes changes one's ideas. Beth Kaplan, 23,
of Binghamton, N.Y., became a vegan (one who doesn't eat dairy or eggs as well
as meat) in her teens. Both her parents thought it was a fad. But nowadays, her
father, Marvin, is eating less meat for health reasons-"He likes it when I cook
for him, and always says how much energy he has for days afterward," she says. A
retired biology teacher, Marvin is also glad that young people are asking
questions about the ethical treatment of animals.
A charming example of a mother and son who became vegetarians
together are Sheila Jacobs, a Manhattan nurse, and her son Glenn, now 22. "I
never liked the way I felt after eating hamburger, or seeing the fat coming up
in the pot," she says, "and when he became a vegetarian at 16, he encouraged me.
That made it easier for me not to cook meat."
Today, Sheila is not only a vegetarian, but an animal rights
activist. As for her own elderly mother, "I cook such great vegetarian dishes
that she likes it."
The best way a vegetarian adult can handle a non-vegetarian
parent, says Veggie Singles' Goldberg, is "to teach by example--don't preach
to parents that what they're doing is evil." On a humorous note, he recently
published a cartoon in "Veggie Singles News" showing a family around the
Thanksgiving table, all eating turkey except for one. The head of the family is
praying, "...and dear Lord, we also accept Charlene, who refuses to accept your
great and gracious bounty1x"
Check out
berkeley for a
searchable database of Vegetarian Recipes. Bon
appetit1x
